I am two days past my due date with "Pops." I am realizing more how these last days or even hours of pregnancy could be my last ever because of our desire to do foster care and adopt another child. There are certainly things I will miss about being pregnant. I will miss the extreme joy and excitement of taking a pregnancy test and doing a double take when it comes out positive. I will miss thinking about all the ways I could tell Justin, and I will miss the way his face danced with excitement every time I told him. I will miss that first ultrasound where you see a little heart and all it's chambers beating wildly. I miss the feeling of love for a little being you have not really ever seen, but who you come to know and think about constantly. I will miss the kicking, jabbing, turning, and rolling of a little one experimenting with her arms and legs inside me. I will miss the little hiccups that distract me just enough to not let me sleep. I love the looks of sympathy, compassion, and the smiles of joy that my belly bring to the faces of those around me in the neighborhood. I love the way people go out of their way for me in the grocery store, and all the questions about when I am due and if it is a boy or girl. I love the stories strangers randomly begin to tell me once they notice I am pregnant. I will miss the smile that brightens my day from the girl at the frozen yogurt store when I come in for the 5th night in a row.
I thank God for the wonderful pregnancy experiences I have had, and although it saddens me for it to come to an end, I can't wait for the joy of finally holding my new daughter in my arms!!