Spiritual Care Planning

     Ask any nurse what a care plan is and nightmares of all-nighters come to mind. It is part of every nursing program... this structure that is taught in hopes to train you in how to think through problem solving varieties of health issues. Not diagnosing diseases as doctors do, but making a nursing diagnosis of an ailment, and explaining how we are going to fix it. Something as simple as a rash, can have a 3 page write-up, covering every aspect of the rash. First we make an assessment: what is the problem?     Then we make a nursing diagnosis: What is the cause? Then we make an expected outcome: What do we want to see?  Then comes the action plan: How are we going to achieve the desired outcome? The last step is to evaluate your plan after implementing. How is it working?
     Immediately when introduced to this method in nursing school, I saw the awesome spiritual parallels. Sin is a disease of our soul, and God is the doctor. He is the one who can heal our hearts. If we are purposeful to ask the Lord to change our hearts, and let his Word take hold of our soul, He will be faithful to change our hearts.

2 Peter 1:3 "seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence."

Philippians 4:13 "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

Psalms 119:11 "Your word I have treasured in my heart, That I may not sin against You."

I wrote this Care Plan a long time ago. My small group girls and I all wrote a few for the different things we were struggling with at the time. It was helpful for us to share them with each other, and they have been helpful through the years in different counseling situations. It is fun and so helpful to get creative in our fight against sin.

I can honestly say that any anger I struggled with towards my husband during the first few years after having children, when he was studying in seminary, is long gone. My love for him grows everyday. It is not from me. The Lord changed my heart. He refined this area of sin for me, He took it away. I praise Him with all my heart for this work he has done in me!

Spiritual Care Plan

Anger at Spouse

(Fall 2008)

Assessment: 

There are times when I feel angry at my husband. When his plans are different than mine, when he doesn’t do what I think he should do, or when he does something I don’t think he should do. I dwell on what he has or hasn’t done and I think in my head about what I want to say to him about it (usually not in a friendly tone). I might snap at him or give him a hard time, nagging him about it. 

Heart Diagnosis: 

Selfishness:  I want him to do what I want and when I want him to. 

Laziness:  I think that he should do more, when really, I should serve him more. 

Expected  Heart Change:

Servants Heart: Expect nothing of him and everything of myself.  Serve him faithfully no matter what he does or doesn’t do.  Focus more on how I can serve him.

Diligence: Focus on working hard all day as working for the Lord. 

Love: A love for my husband that is peaceful and steadfast, not determined by circumstances of the day.  A true love that can overlook anything, even outright sin, and love him just the same, just like the Lord does for me.

Action Plan:

Mornings:

The Word: I will wake up EVERY morning and spend quality time in the word and in prayer. I will read these scriptures daily:

Philippians 2:3-4 “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves;  do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”  

Mark 9:35 “Sitting down, He called the twelve and said to them, "If anyone wants to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all."

Romans 12: 1 Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, [which is] your spiritual service of worship. 2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.  3 For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith. 4 For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, 5 so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. 6 Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, [each of us is to exercise them accordingly]

Romans 12: 9[Let] love [be] without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil; cling to what is good. 10[Be] devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor; 11 not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; 12 rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer, 13 contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality.  14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. 16 Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation. 17 Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all men. 18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. 

Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Colossians 3:8   But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth.

Colossians 3: 1-10   1 Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth. 3 For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.

5 Therefore consider the members of your earthly body as dead to immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and greed, which amounts to idolatry. 6 For it is because of these things that the wrath of God will come upon the sons of disobedience, 7 and in them you also once walked, when you were living in them. 8 But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth. 9 Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, 10 and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One who created him

Colossians 3:12-17

12 So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. 14 Beyond all these things [put on] love, which is the perfect bond of unity. 15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms [and] hymns [and] spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 Whatever you do in word or deed, [do] all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.

Prayer:  I will pray every morning that the Lord will give me love for my husband and the ability to forget about what bothers me, but be enamored with the qualities I fell in love with in him.  I will pray for him.  I will use the “Praying Daily for my Husband” as a guide to help me pray daily for him.

Through the day: I will listen to several worship songs during the day that talk of my upmost depravity and remind me how I do not deserve anything or anyone. I am a total sinner in need of a savior.

Before he gets home:  I will pray once more before he gets home from work and read through a few scriptures.

When with my husband: I will put on acts and words of love for him no matter what I feel. When I start to feel angry with him: 

I will look for a way to serve him. 

I will recite, in my head, the verses I have memorized

I will silently pray for grace, peace, joy and love. 

Healthy Easter Egg Fillers for Kids and Toddlers

We have been trying to eat healthy and cut back on the junk. We are not planning to buy any of the typical candy at Easter this year.  It is so tempting to buy chocolate marshmallow bunnies and all the other yummy goodness out there at easter, so I am putting together a slightly more healthy list for egg stuffers and Easter baskets that I can refer back to every year (and change if needed).  Since we have cut back on most refined sugars and “boxed foods,” any of the foods on this list will be considered a treat to the kids. 

Egg Fillers:

colored goldfish

fruit snacks

chocolate covered raisins/peanuts

strawberries (part of the fun is just the suprise of finding out what is inside)

dried apple rings

cinnamon sugar gram crackers

pretzels

semi sweet chocolate chips/ mini chips

dollar store rubber bugs or animals

quarters

stickers

hair bows

bouncy balls

deflated balloon to blow up (esp for andrew, he loves balloons)

flower seeds for spring planting

silly putty

erasers

rub on tatoos

Easter Baskets:

crayons

gardening tools

cookie cutters

framed picture of you and your child

flash cards or game

popcorn

I am sure this list will be updated and added too. (updated, May 2013-  i took off some of the more unhealthy things from this list.)

Some other easter activities:

Resurrection garden: Make the path from the Last Supper through to the tomb in a long rectangle garden planter, adding some fun plants to make it look real, and a small circle pot on its side for the tomb and a stone to cover the opening. Make some people out of clothes pins and walk them through the story. 

10 Wonderful Years!!

Justin and I celebrated our 10th anniversary with a little getaway. We went an hour north to the beach up by Bodega Bay, and a little town called Occidental. We had been there once before when Justin took me on a surprise trip during our first year of marriage. It was fun to be back in the same town remembering back when we were there 10 years ago. It feels like so long ago. We were such different people and just starting out in our marriage. It is fun to look at how far we have come, and how much more we know and love each other now. This has been the best 10 years of my life.  In every way it has been more than I had ever dreamed of!! Justin is an amazing man to be married to, and such a wonderful friend, partner, teammate and leader... he is my best friend. I look forward to the next 10 years, and all the joy he will bring to my life.  Thank you God for the blessing of Justin in my life. I pray we will have more anniversaries until Jesus comes in the clouds to take us home together with our family. 

Proverbs 31 not 21!!

Recently I have struggled through saying no to various commitments I would love to do for the Lord. Our community group leaders, Mark and Amy Wenslawski, sent me an article that was really convicting and encouraging at the same time. As I desire to be a Proverbs 31 woman, I fear in my desire to do it all, I have become a Proverbs 21 woman!  Here is a short clip of the article they sent me from the gospel coalition:


"Many women's Bible studies discuss how to become a "Proverbs 31 woman." An excellent wife, who can find! These studies would also do well to caution women against becoming a "Proverbs 21 woman." "It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife. It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman (Proverbs 21:9, 19)...  Are you a quarrelsome and fretful wife? Are you the common denominator of dissension and strife in your home? Or are you a supportive and helpful wife? Are you building your home by God's grace in order to bring it under the headship of your husband to the glory of Jesus? Or do you foolishly tear down your home with your own hands (Proverbs 14:1)?"

My wonderful mentor Cindy McCary gave me some very wise words today. She told me a lot of times we try hard to do things the Lord has NOT called us to do. She also advised that only... and ONLY... when the ministry God has called you to is completely in order, can you even think about adding another ministry.  I have always known this in principal and have tried to apply it, but it has really "hit home" in the past month as my kids and hubby have needed me more than ever in the various stages of their lives.  There are only so many hours in the day, and all my hours are now filled up.  All other good and wonderful things I want to do for the Lord will have to wait until another season of life.  I have a new and divine peace in this area of my life, and I am loving my wonderful God who is so faithful to me and is always teaching me and guiding me. He sends people and circumstances consistently in my life that fit together like a puzzle to teach me things, there is no way it could all happen by chance. I would be insane if I didn't trust him fully.  He is so gentle, patient, and loving to me... my heart overflows with love back to Him!!  I am so grateful for all the wonderful people God has put in my life to encourage me and spur me on towards godliness!!

Every Body Matters

As I look ahead to 2012, one of the major things I need to resolve to do is to take better care of myself. I need to be more physically active, and eat better. Wow. I don't think I have ever made this most popular resolution in my life and I feel slightly disappointed that it has come to this. Give up all the good stuff? What a bummer! I have become that person who eats to comfort and to make the chaos in my life seem bearable.

Woken up 12 times during the night? Starbucks venti frap WITH whip :)
Poop smeared all over the toilet? Forget for a moment that i saw it and grab a fruit roll up.
Dinner and clean up took 3 hours and there is still goo smeared all over the table and what did i just step in?-BIG bowl of ice-cream WITH chocolate sauce (and sometimes heath crunch... yumm)
Hubby gone again tonight and a laundry pile that could easily stack to be as tall as me? Several handfuls of the kids haloween candy and a coke-a-cola

I have finally made the diagnosis of myself that I am trying to comfort my at-times-very-uncomfortable life right now with food. It needs to stop, and stop it will...BECAUSE... sin is no longer my master. My life in Christ that allows me to identify sin, and get rid of it. I have power over sin and gluttony is the sin I must master. YAYYYY God! Here we go!! No desserts for a month, then only once every other week. Seems reasonable to me.

Romans 6:6-7 We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin.

I was encouraged by my friend Matt Mikalatos with this section of: Every Body Matters by Gary Thomas:

"The 300 Pound Pastor

When Mark Bejsovec, a youth pastor, saw the scale creep over 300 pounds, he gulped. During his high school football playing days, he carried just 186 pounds on his six-foot-two frame. In his early thirties, however, Mark started gaining weight steadily. At first, he rationalized it and even began using it like a tool. It made him seem funnier. He could push out his stomach until he looked like he was pregnant, and the kids in his ministry would laugh: “You look like you got twins!”
When he hit 300 pounds, though, Mark began to sense God speaking to him about his physical condition.
“I looked into Scripture, specifically at the men in the Bible who assumed leadership roles, and wondered how they must have looked. I couldn’t find anyone in leadership who was overweight.”
This wasn’t about vanity, but rather about being a better steward of his body and his calling: “If I was addressing only spiritual issues but not the physical ones, I considered I would be less useful to the Lord in my ministry. If I was going to remain in ministry, I needed to honor God with all my heart, all my soul, all my mind, and also all my body.”
By definition, we can’t be a leader in secret. Somebody is following us. And the bodies we are leading with aren’t hidden.
A friend of mine, who works as a senior director for a major Christian development organization, recently shared with me the battle he faces with eating and exercise. On a recent business trip, he ate twenty-four restaurant meals in a row. He’s concerned about his health habits, and like many, he lives with a constant sense of failure that he could be doing more about his weight. What he doesn’t see are spiritual leaders taking this struggle as seriously as he does. “We’ve been taught in the evangelical tradition about adultery and lying and stealing and coveting,” he says, “and about lust and alcoholism and smoking and drug abuse. But many evangelical pastors who preach against these things are visibly overweight or obese. I don’t say this to judge them—I struggle with the same thing. But sometimes I wonder. Sure, they may have conquered the online porn, but it seems like they’re ‘medicating’ with food; I get that, because I do the same thing.”
For his part, Mark decided to quit his former eating habits cold turkey. When his weight started coming off, Mark experienced a rush of positive energy. “I started feeling more affirmed, my self-esteem went up, and my relationship with God grew. It’s not that my previous life didn’t honor God, but now it felt like I was living like God designed me to live.”
When I asked Mark what changed most about his life since he lost seventy pounds, he responded, “Let’s be honest: there were times I was discredited because of the way I looked. When I talked to kids about self-control in other areas, they could look at me and understandably ask why I wasn’t addressing my issues with food. But now, when I share my story, there’s an added inspirational element. If I can do it, anyone can do it, and my weight loss has become an effective tool in my ministry.”
As a writer whose most prominent books relate to marriage, I take it as a personal challenge to maintain the integrity of my own marriage. I can’t write and teach on marriage if my own is falling apart. As a pastor, however, when I talk to the church about self-control; when I preach on the necessity of personal discipline, good stewardship in all areas of life, and, above all, when I teach out of 1 Corinthians 6:20: “You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body” I am going to completely undercut my message if I’m preaching out of a body that denies this.
It would be convenient if being a leader didn’t require also being an example, but that’s not the case. Paul writes, “Follow me as I follow Christ.” (1 Cor. 11:1)
Leaders, let’s ask ourselves, “Is my body serving or thwarting my message?” If you’re a pastor, you may well have accepted financial sacrifice for the privilege of being in the ministry; if you’re a leader of any type, you have readily accepted the sacrifice of your time, tranquility, and even reputation, as leadership assaults all of these. But will you also accept bodily sacrifice—watching what you eat, and putting in the effort to get appropriate exercise? Will you recognize that the body out of which you lead can either support or undercut the message that you carry?
I am not suggesting that we pick leaders by how thin they are, or that we make a direct connection between a person’s BMI and his holiness. That would be ridiculous, ignorant, and unfair—some bodies aren’t designed to be thin, other bodies seem to naturally stay thin regardless of how they are cared for or fed, but leaders, we know our own journey, we know whether this area of stewardship is feeding or hindering our maturity and ministry. Don’t all of us feel better, stronger, more energetic, when we’re being faithful in this area? And don’t we all know that there are negative consequences when we get careless?
So, in a spirit of encouragement and grace, let’s admit that this is something we need to start talking about. Just as we seemed eager to denounce the opulent affluence and money-raising scandals of the 1980s televangelists, let’s not be blind to our own contemporary challenges at the dawn of the 21st century."

A Few of my Favorite Things!!

These are a few of my new favorite things this summer. Here is a wonderful glass sippy cup from Lifefactory. I love using this on a daily basis for Katelyn, and then taking our plastic ones when we are on the road. Glass holds up so much better and... who knows the benefit of daily glass vs daily plastic. I feel it is safe to leave water overnight in this sippy vs a plastic one because of all the talk of plastic leaching into the water.


This is my new favorite kitchen organizing method... glass jars. I love them. I bought widemouth glass jars and plastic caps to fit them from Amazon. I feel so much more organized in my cupboards, especially because some of our shelves are much higher than normal. I can use these for leftovers and in the freezer too!



On our patio we have a wonderful turtle sandbox. When it is hot enough, we fill it with water. However, it has been cool some weeks this summer, so I decided to fill it with beans. I didn't want the mess and hassle of sand. The first beans we have tried are El Dorado beans, bought cheap at a local Mexican supermarket. They have held up nicely in the summer heat, but they do break if an adult steps on them. I will be experimenting with different types of beans to find one that is more sturdy. My next try will be Pinto beans. When they are done playing, I simply sweep them into a dust pan and dump them back into the turtle. This has provided SO many hours of good "clean" fun for the girls!!

Psalms 121:4

As I battle through each day somewhat sleep deprived, I am reminded that my God supply's my strength, and not my hours of sleep. My God is never tired and He is always available to give me energy! This truth is so comforting! My friend Sara made this cute burp cloth at a baby shower recently. How appropriate is this verse for a nursing mother at 3am!

From the Farm

Michelle Gutie recomended "Farm Fresh to You"... so we tried it out. I love that all this fresh, in season produce just arrived on my doorstep!! I got this entire box for $31.50 (that is including the delivery). Everything so far has been really wonderful!! Thanks Michelle!!

Flying Paper Cutter!

This morning I had a little run in with a paper cutter from my closet; it suddenly sprouted wings and came flying at me at an incredible rate!! I am so happy that all six stitches are nestled nicely in my eyebrow. The cut (as you can see in the picture) even curves along with my eyebrow!! The doctor doesn't think you will even be able to see it once it is healed! As she scrubbed it clean (before the lidocane... not quite sure why the lidocane couldn't have come first) I thought of all the people in Hati who were undergoing much worse without any medication. My heart aches for them and all the pain and suffering around the world.

Reflections on Pregnancy

I am two days past my due date with "Pops." I am realizing more how these last days or even hours of pregnancy could be my last ever because of our desire to do foster care and adopt another child. There are certainly things I will miss about being pregnant. I will miss the extreme joy and excitement of taking a pregnancy test and doing a double take when it comes out positive. I will miss thinking about all the ways I could tell Justin, and I will miss the way his face danced with excitement every time I told him. I will miss that first ultrasound where you see a little heart and all it's chambers beating wildly. I miss the feeling of love for a little being you have not really ever seen, but who you come to know and think about constantly. I will miss the kicking, jabbing, turning, and rolling of a little one experimenting with her arms and legs inside me. I will miss the little hiccups that distract me just enough to not let me sleep. I love the looks of sympathy, compassion, and the smiles of joy that my belly bring to the faces of those around me in the neighborhood. I love the way people go out of their way for me in the grocery store, and all the questions about when I am due and if it is a boy or girl. I love the stories strangers randomly begin to tell me once they notice I am pregnant. I will miss the smile that brightens my day from the girl at the frozen yogurt store when I come in for the 5th night in a row.
I thank God for the wonderful pregnancy experiences I have had, and although it saddens me for it to come to an end, I can't wait for the joy of finally holding my new daughter in my arms!!

Thank You Jesus!

This year I have so much to be thankful for! With the delivery of our third little one coming soon, I can truly say I am so thankful for the three great pregnancies the Lord has given me. I am even thankful for the times of horrible morning sickness, that He used to grow and stretch me in ways I never imagined possible.
Because of my deeper understanding in the past few years of God's sovereignty, I can say I would be equally as grateful to Him had the outcomes of my pregnancies been different, if there had been trauma, pain, death, or sickness. God orchestrates the events and situations in our lives for our spiritual good. Every situation is a gift from Him to those who love Him and follow Him. The anxiety of not knowing what will happen with this little one inside of me can creep up ... will she be healthy? will she have the cord around her neck? will she even be alive at the end of the birth? Because God's ways are too high and lofty for us to even begin to comprehend, I can rest in the fact that He is sovern and whatever he wills to do, it will be for my good, for the baby's good, for Justin, Kalena and Sara's good. I praise God for that this Thanksgiving. I am thankful that I can relax no matter what happens, and I will give thanks to him in all situations. For those who love and follow him, there are none who have their days cut short, who have there heath taken away, or who are outside any situation that pleases God. God sends death, sickness, trials and tribulations for our good. It pleases Him. Earthly sorrow is can be very appropriate in a believer, but great joy, comfort and thanksgiving come with knowing God has caused all things.